So a lot of things have happened since I last posted. And I have good news and bad news of many, many varieties. So I'll do this in a very schizophrenic way: I'll say something good, and then something bad.
The good news is:
I'm going to have more free time outside of classes to devote to writing here, doing stuff for AIESEC, etc.
The bad news is:
I had to drop down to 9 credit hours.
I really feel bad about this. I was planning to pull this all-nighter tonight to finish all the work and reading and papers I had to do for tomorrow, plus prepare for the board of advisors meeting tomorrow which I
have to do tonight because I plan on sleeping tomorrow morning and afternoon. I finished my ethics paper (thank GOD) and saw that I had seven hours to do my empirical methods paper, which I thought would be sufficient. It's only 1000 words, afterall. But then I get started on it... and I realize there's no way in holy hell that I'm going to be able to pull it off. And I don't even have an excuse for it. It was all just very bad time management. I could retreat into the explanations of having too much to do... but look at everyone else on the EB that's taking classes. Hell, look at Amy and Arcadiy and Tiffany (Ms. 21 hours... ugh). The worst part of it all is that I already had dropped a class earlier this week... my Vietnam War class. There was just way too much reading for it... over 100 pages each week. It was a really great class too.
I ended up dropping Empirical Methods too, if that wasn't obvious already. I really hope I'm not starting a trend of biting off more than I can chew. With any luck, I'll get into the groove of balancing academics and extracurriculars by the end of the semester... I've never had to do that, ever. In high school I glided through classes without doing
any substancial work and just doing the bare minimum for projects, and ended up getting A's/B's and somehow managing to get my IB diploma. I hadn't participated in very many intensive outside activities either, until senior year when I sank myself into robotics as a worthless cheerleader. And then my first two years at tech were basically repeats of high school... gliding through core classes and focusing on the hard ones *cough*bullshitphysics*cough* and not giving any heed to student orgs. And then this past fall... Katie pulls me into AIESEC. That semester went well, but only because I didn't really do much of anything substancial within the organization. I was a warm body.
But this semester? Rip took off, and I felt the need to be important. This is the year that we're supposed to boom. As Tiffany said, "Last year we did all the talking. This year? It's y'alls job to do all the doing." And it's been a culture that is very good for the organization... but very bad for me in terms of what I can handle. I took up this huge role and at the same time took for granted the amount of time I'd have to invest in it. And of course, I had registered for the same number of hours that I usually take. In hindsight, I haven't even been that busy with @ in general either... like I said, it was all bad time management. Combined, all the work I had at the beginning of this semester probably would've added up to about 21 credit hours worth of work. Something like that is entirely feasible, of course, but it's not something I'm used to. I don't have the work ethic for that yet. I get things done, but I get them done at a 15 credit hour pace. And where did that leave me? Doing my AIESEC obligations and scrambling to get my academic obligations met. And now I'm down 2 classes.
But enough of that emo belly-aching. I don't regret any of it. In fact, I think it's a good thing that I've been thrust into this headfirst. It's been a great wake-up call.
More good news: I'm going to Morocco!
More bad news: I'm not going to Wales.
Pretty simple there. I'll get over the Wales thing... eventually. ;)
Good news: my Global Business Environment project group is finally coming together.
Bad news: I have no fucking idea what our product is or what it does.
This is one of the classes that I refused to drop, along with ethics. It's only taught once a year so I'd have to wait until next Spring if I wanted to take it again. I have huge expectations for how this class is going to turn out. It already feels like the culminating research paper in this class could be something to stick onto a resume in of itself, like the policy brief I wrote last semester for Foreign Policy. Hooray for being well-rounded...
Good news: RoKS is finally starting to come together.
Bad news: I need to stop bringing up things that aren't official.
I brought it up earlier this week that I thought I'd get as much as half of the conference paid for by these two foundations. Now I'm not so sure. I sent in the revised budget to both of them on Monday night, and I haven't heard back from them yet. This is after having a less than 12 hour response time on every other correspondence. I'm really dreading that email where they say they're not interested or can't help us based on what they can and cannot pay for. And I'm dreading the next LTM and next OC conference call even more. It really sucks to have to say "Sorry guys, we're not getting that money anymore..." In hindsight, I probably shouldn't have brought it up at LTM this past Sunday, but I was
so certain that we'd get it at the time. Like 90%. I've been so wrapped up this week that I still haven't made the calls to Papa John's and Einstein's/Publix either like I planned for this week. I'm becoming such a failure as an OCVP Finance. But the week's not over yet... there's still time.
I need to learn the extent to which I can kick myself and have it be constructive, and at which point it becomes overly self-deprecating and just emo.
Labels: AIESEC, impending doom, MENA, Morocco, motivation, RoKS
